


shame in your defeat

by grantwater



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: At least not right away, F/F, F/M, Princess!Emma, au where the dark curse isn't cast, i wanted something to post but had no motivation to write, i wrote this years ago when ouat was still on, please don't judge this too hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 16:47:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29670252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grantwater/pseuds/grantwater
Summary: Regina Mills has lost. Locked away in the White Kingdom's dungeons for nearly two decades, the only human interaction she's had is with the ever charming King and Queen.That is, until the Princess pays her a visit.
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan, Prince Charming | David Nolan/Snow White | Mary Margaret Blanchard
Comments: 20
Kudos: 60





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> okay so first of all, i realized in the comments of i'm not angry anymore that i accidentally posted chapter 3 twice (ty so much to the commenter, i don't remember who it was bc it got deleted when i deleted the chapter). but i'm gonna try to actually write something for that fic, since i really don't want to leave it open ended. in the meantime have some ouat au that i wrote 4 years ago and never posted or finished :)

How?

How had she been captured? It had been only a moment before she was to depart and take her father’s heart to that spot in the woods, the one where she’d failed the at first to fulfill her dreams and take away Snow White’s happiness, her life. And then her castle had been stormed by the Princess’s soldiers. They’d managed to take out all her guards but her Huntsman. And as much as the two had fought against the white clad soldiers, they had failed. Snow White and Prince Charming had strolled into the room like it was their own home, brought the Huntsman and the Queen to their knees, and forced their surrender. And before she could use her magic to escape, they’d unwillingly made her drink a potion to subdue her magic.

She’d been stripped of her dark, skintight gown, had every red feather ripped from her hair, and had been made to wear what could be graciously called a dress-it was parchment thin and hung loosely from her body. Her feet adorned grey slippers, matching her dress. Her long hair fell in her face, distorting her vision. And as much as she growled and bit and fought, she couldn’t break free. She at least thought they’d take her Huntsman to the same fate, to rot for the rest of their days together. But they’d found her vault, and returned his heart to him, allowing him free will. And of course, that traitor had chosen to join the White Kingdom. The Queen had spit curses at him, at that whole damned kingdom then. Because now she was truly alone. Her father was gone, his heart still in a box on the vanity. Maleficent was right, she thought scornfully. She would truly have a void in her heart she’d never be able to fill.

Now, she sat in the dungeons of her own kingdom, in her own castle. No magic, no family, nothing but the cold stone walls and the rats that crawled around on the floors. The new reigning King and Queen had come down to explain the terms of her capture. She would receive food twice a day, at sunrise and sunset. She would be closely monitored all hours of the day. She would have no unauthorized visitors, and what she found worst of all, no magic. That shepherd had said that she would be locked down here until she died, but the insolent princess had corrected her husband, saying that if the Queen could change her ways, learn to forgive and control her temper and magic, that she might be able to come out, and live the rest of her days in the castle as a servant. Regina spat at the royal’s feet. They left without a word.

How pathetic she felt, sitting here. Alone, cold, and weak. But there she would stay, for the rest of her days. In defeat, she slumped against the wall, slipped down to the floor, and began to weep.

//

//

As soon as Snow White and Prince Charming had walked back up from the dungeon, the princess had felt liquid drip down her legs, and a pain in her bulging stomach. She turned to her husband, and they both knew what was happening.

Their child was coming.

She ran to one of the bedrooms in the castle while David found the dwarf Doc. By the time the two men had arrived, Snow White was shaking and sweating, groaning in pain. It won’t be long now, Doc had assured her, until this baby comes. So she waited, whimpering at each contraction and kick from the baby inside of her.

The girl had shouted a string of profanity at the dwarf, yelling that he had lied. It had been nearly two hours since she went into labor, and the child still wasn’t ready to leave her womb. She’d begged to Charming, begged and begged for him to get this parasite out of her because if he didn’t, she was sure she would not make it through the night. And as much as he assured her that no such thing would happen, she did not listen. She just writhed and howled, for hours on end. It wasn’t until the sun went down that her friend told her it was time to push. She complied without a thought.

It took only a few moments for the child to slip from her womb and into the world. The child’s eyes shone a bright grass green in the candlelight, and she had a small tuft of blonde hair on her head. She did not cry. All she did was squirm and look around with curiosity.

“What shall her name be?” Doc asked as he cleaned up the child, cutting the cord that attached her to her mother. The exhausted woman took a breath, and her husband wiped a few hairs from her sweat-soaked skin.

“Emma,” She finally breathed out. “Princess Emma. But why hasn’t she cried? I thought babes were supposed to cry? I did when I was born.”

Doc wrapped a blanket around the child-a blanket with her name knit in by Granny-and walked back over to the couple to hand them their child. “While it is common for children to cry when they leave the womb, not all do. And as far as I can tell, little Emma here is a perfectly happy child.”

“Thank Gods,” Charming sighed, relief flooding his veins. A simple nod from the Prince, and the dwarf left the couple to the quiet of the room, telling them he’d be outside if there was any trouble. “Now that Regina is locked away,” he began as he sat down next to his wife, “we know that our child will be safe. There will be nothing to worry about, my dearest.”

Snow White nodded, leaning down and pressing a kiss to Emma’s head. The child still had yet to make a noise. “She will be safe, and will grow to be a fine and respected leader. But for now, I need rest. Will you take her to the nursery, then come back down and join me?” The shepherd smiled softly and took the babe into his arms. Moments after the door shut, the princess, and now mother, fell into a deep sleep.

//

//

The Queen had wept for hours now, and even though she was sure, she could weep no longer, tears still fell from her eyes. The darkness of the night brought her no comfort.

In another part of the castle, little Emma had woken from her slumber. In the dark, with no one else in the room with her, she knew not what to do. So, she did what babies do best: squirm and cry.

Neither the babe nor the prisoner knew that the other let out loud cries of anguish that night.


	2. two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Princess Emma is growing up. And an evil soul so loves the corruption of a child.

“Emma, please don’t run with that!” Snow White shouted at her daughter. Emma, being only six years old, did not listen, and continued to run around, swiping the air with her little wooden sword.

“But I need to fight the dragon, momma!” The princess shouted breathlessly, turning to face her mother. “Once I fight the dragon, the kingdom will be safe!”

David came around the corner behind his child and picked her up, smiling. The young girl squealed and giggled at her father. “Well, princess, the soldiers would go and fight the dragon. You’d stay back to make sure the kingdom was safe from the castle.” The girl pouted and dropped her sword to the ground.

“But I _wanna_ go fight the dragon!” She cried. “Being a soldier seems like fun.”

“Perhaps,” Snow began as she walked to her husband and child, “we could enroll you into some lessons when you’re older. It’s always useful to know how to defend yourself, and your kingdom.” Emma’s face grew bright, and she laughed and clapped her hands in delight.

“Thank you momma!” She said, then jumped out of her fathers arms, grabbed her sword, and continued her imaginary battle. David chuckled and wrapped an arm around his wife’s waist.

“She’s just like you, you know. Want’s to protect her kingdom and fight for what she believes in,” He whispered into her ear. Snow smiled, but there was a sort of sadness behind it. Her husband did not notice.

“I just wonder if that will be a good thing, or a bad one.”

//

//

How long had it been?

How long had it been that the Queen sat in darkness, in the cold. No one would talk to her, inform her of the happenings of the kingdom, of _her_ kingdom. She didn’t even know what year it was.

Snow White and her Prince Charming would sometimes come down and visit her, see how she was. They would interrogate her to the brink of insanity. She’d try not to answer most times, and in the beginning, they would just leave. But then the potions started.

They’d slip them into her drinks at mealtimes, then come down and talk with her. And to her dismay, she was compelled to answer them. Luckily, she was still able to taunt the couple. She would tell the girl how even though she’d given birth to her child, she still looked pregnant. Sometimes she felt bad. Most of the time she didn’t.

She may not have known much, but she knew the Princess’s name. _Emma._ From what the King and Queen had let slip, the girl was young, very rowdy, and ambitious. Easily corruptible.

Oh, the Queen would have fun destroying her.

//

//

Emma lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. She had not been able to sleep , thinking too much about her first upcoming ball, and thirteenth birthday. But she couldn’t leave her room. The guards and her parent’s forbade it. So she just lay in the dark and the quiet. Her first ball was only two days away, and she wanted to be anywhere but at the castle.

“Oh,” the girl sighed. “How I wish that I could figure out a way to get out of this dreadful place.”

“That might be easier to arrange than you believe.”

Emma jumped up from her sheets at the voice. It was a mans, and rather high pitched. Emma was terrified. “Who are you? I-I can call for the guards and they’ll take you away!”

“There’s no need for that, dearie.” The man spoke again. Emma turned to find the source of the voice: The man had sparkling skin and wide, insane eyes. His hair was oily, and his fingernails had dirt caked underneath them. “Rumplestiltskin, at your service,” He bowed, and when he came back up, let out an ominous giggle.

“Who are you?” She repeated, moving just a step closer to the creature standing before her.

“I’m just someone who can help you get what you want, Emma.” The girl raised a shocked brow.

“How do you know my name?”

“I know many things, dearie, your name just happens to be one of those things. Now do you have anymore questions, or do you want help?”

Emma bit her lip in contemplation. She didn’t even know this man! But, he said that he could help her.

“What can you do?” She asked.

“I can teach you magic. You’d be able to leave whenever you like, and you’d have anything you’d want. But, I’d need a little, itty bitty something as payment.” He explained, prowling around her. She shivered when he put his hands on her shoulders and leaned close to her ear. She could feel his breath on her neck.

“What would you need? I could give you gold, an army, any-“

“Oh no, nothing of that sort.” Rumplestiltskin cut her off, putting a scaly finger to her lips. What I would like is… A strand of hair off your pretty little head.”

“Why on earth would you need my hair?” She stepped away from him.

“Would you like to be free, or not?” Emma sighed, and plucked a single strand of her blonde hair off of her head. She handed it to him, and when it landed in his hand, there was a puff of red smoke and then it was gone. Emma gasped.

“Was that magic?” He nodded. “So when can I learn?”

“Your lessons shall begin the night of your thirteenth birthday. When you’re ready for me,” He paused, smiling menacingly. “I’ll be waiting for you.” There was another high pitched laugh, and then he was gone.

//

//

She had begun to feel it in the middle of the night.

At first, it had only felt like a pinprick. But as the nights wore on, the feeling had grown into her whole body. She hadn’t felt it in so long, she almost couldn’t remember what it was. But she could never forget.

_Magic._

It was in the castle. And there was only one person whom she could think of that would even come close to possessing magic in this castle. The Princess.

Oh, this will be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for the kudos & kind reviews on the last chapter!! i was gonna wait to post this but since i already had it written i figured why not. hope you enjoyed, keep an eye out for the next chapter soon!


	3. three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an evil lurks in the white kingdom's dungeons.   
> perhaps it's time princess emma makes a visit.

Emma’s eighteenth birthday was fast approaching, and she wanted anything but for it to come. Because one she was eighteen, she would start making decisions with her parents for the sake of the castle and the kingdom. And once she was married, she would rule as Queen.

Gods, she just wanted to be free.

Her lessons with the Dark One had been going well. He kept true to his promise, teaching her on the night of her thirteenth birthday, and every night then on. He told her he was one of his best students, all except for one: Regina Mills. He never told her more, and when she looked in the history books in the library, she could never find anything on the Mills family tree. She’d never dare to ask her parents about her.

But there was one night when she was so restless that she couldn’t stay in her room. She opted to walk around the castle instead. With a wave of her hand, she knocked out the guards that she passed, so as they wouldn’t see her.

She was so bored of just wandering aimlessly around rooms she’d already seen before. There were very few she hadn’t seen. One of them: the Dungeons. Her parent’s would never allow her to go to the dungeons, ever. She’d always ask why, but they’d always respond with “There is a great evil down there. You shall never be allowed to go down there.”

But, she thought, my parents are not here now, are they?

So she flicked her wrist and knocked out the two guards standing watch at the entrance to the dungeons, opened the door, and grabbed a torch off of the wall beside her. And slowly, she began her descent into darkness. It seemed to have taken forever, but she eventually made it down the narrow, twisting stairs. One more flick, and the guards who stood watch of the actual cells were lying on the ground. The blonde grabbed a dagger off of one’s belt, and continued on.

“Oh, is it time again for one of your interrogations?” A voice spoke. Emma couldn’t find where it was coming from. “I didn’t taste the potion in my water last night.”

“Where are you?” The girl called out, turning and looking around for the voice.

“Please, don’t play coy with me, Snow.” The voice spoke again. “You know where I am. You always know where I am.” It took Emma by surprise, how the voice sounded. It was a woman’s, she could tell. It had a sad rasp to it, but it sounded young. The only time she would hear that kind of sound was from the old duchess’s she was forced to meet at balls and events with her parents. It was one that had barely seen the world, one that had been stuffed into dresses and castles their whole life.

After a few moments more of searching, she found the source of such sounds. The sight took her by surprise.

The woman looked to be about the same age as her mother, perhaps a bit younger. She had long, black hair, but it hung limp around her face. She wore a thin grey dress, and no shoes. Her face was gaunt, with dark brown eyes sunken in to her skull. She was very, very skinny as well. She looked like she could have been pretty at one point in her life.

“You aren’t Snow, or Charming,” The woman spat, pushing herself away from the light that emanated from the torch in Emma’s hands. “Who the hell are you?” Emma gasped, not used to hearing such language from a woman. But being the princess that she was, she steeled herself against the harsh language and glared at the prisoner.

“My name is Emma Swan. I am the Princess and heir to the White Kingdom. No prisoner shall speak to me in such a manner as you.” When she stated her title, the black haired woman’s eyes widened, and she ran forward. Before Emma could move, the woman laced her fingers around the girl’s throat and pulled her against the bars.

“You’re the princess?” She whispered in awe. The look in her eyes was one of confusion and anger, and Emma was intrigued beyond comprehension. But as she could not speak, she gasped for breath and nodded as a reply. The woman let her go.

“How old are you?” She practically shouted.

“My eighteenth birthday is in a fortnight,” She replied, rubbing at her throat.

“Eighteen years,” The woman chuckled darkly, turning and walking to the back of her cell. “I’ve been down here for eighteen years. Damn them!”

“What do you mean?” The brunette turned back to the blonde and glared.

“What does it sound like I mean?” She hissed. “Your parents locked me down here eighteen years ago. And judging by the look on your face, they never told you about what they did. About what I did, or who I am.”

“No, they never did. But I think that it is only fair that since I told you who I am, you tell me who you are.” The Princess said. The woman scoffed.

“Well, I suppose you may be right. My name is Regina. Regina Mills. You, however, can call me your Majesty.”

Emma almost dropped her torch.

“ _You’re_ Regina Mills?” She cried. “Oh, I’ve been looking all over for information about you! There’s absolutely nothing about you in the kingdom’s records, and I never wanted to ask my parents about you, and Rumplestiltskin always talks about how you were his star pupil!”

“When did you meet Rumplestiltskin?” Regina asked gravely. The curiosity that had once been in her eyes had turned to what Emma could only describe as fear. “How do you know him?”

“H-he came into my room one night, just before my thirteenth birthday. He’s been teaching me magic for five years. How do you know him?”

“You need to stop learning magic. Do your parents know about him, about this?” She asked, staring at the princess with intensity. Emma shook her head, shocked by the sudden change in Regina’s mood. “Listen to me. You need to stay away from him.”

“But…He says that my magic is powerful enough to rival his, because I’m the product of true love.”

“I know. I felt it. Your magic is strong enough that it somehow broke through the barrier your parents set down here to block my magic. But when you were born he was locked up in a cage that was absolutely impossible for him to break out of. I have no idea how he could have gotten out. I’m begging of you, please don’t listen to anything he says.” Emma simply rolled her eyes.

“If he say’s that I’m powerful enough to rival his magic, then why would I stop?” She asked and began to pace in front of the bars. “And besides, he says that once I turn eighteen, my magic will be strong enough that he can help me break out of the castle and be free.” Regina marveled at how much the princess seemed like her at that age. All she wanted was freedom.

“You can’t believe anything he says, trust me.”

“Just why should I trust you?” The blonde girl sneered. “You’re a prisoner.”

“And I’m down here because of him!” She shouted, practically growling. Emma raised a brow.

“What do you mean? You’re down here because of him?” Regina smirked, slumping back against the wall of her cell.

“Come down again,” She leaned forward with an evil glint in her eye, “and I might consider telling you the story.” Emma asked what she meant again, but the prisoner would not respond. So instead of trying to rouse the story out of her, she glared and turned, stomping away like an angry child. As she walked back up the dark, winding stairwell, the only sound was Regina laughing dryly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and they finally meet! looking at this now i wish i would've written this differently, but the scene fits well within this story. within the next few chapters there will probably be a tone shift, since i wont be posting prewritten chapters from 4 years ago. hopefully y'all will still enjoy everything as it goes along. 
> 
> thanks for reading! reviews and kudos are super appreciated :)


	4. four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So many questions and so few answers

“Hello, Regina.”

The Queen sighed, bringing her legs up to her chest and wrapping her arms around herself. “Charming.” She sneered, looking anywhere but at the man standing in front of her cage. In the eighteen years that had passed since her capture, he had grown a few grey hairs and some small wrinkles. He was still, however, charming to the whole kingdom. Except her, of course. “I suppose you’ve come down here for one of our little chats. But I don’t see your wife anywhere.”

“Snow is helping the princess prepare for her Coronation Ball. It’s just me tonight,” The King explained. Regina smiled darkly, staring up at the man. 

“The princesses’s Coronation Ball?” She asked. “That must mean that she’s finally come of age, and unless you’ve changed tradition, that age is eighteen.” David tilted his head, listening. “So, I’ve been down here for eighteen years. Am I correct?” He nodded. “Hm. Eighteen years, and it feels like so much more. I haven’t even a book to read down here.”

“You know that you’ll never be let out, right? Snow tells you that if you change that maybe you can be let into society again, but you and I both know that no amount of change could ever redeem you. After how many times you tried to kill Snow and I, and the countless innocent citizens of the kingdom whose blood stains your hands, you could never change. You’ll always be Evil.” Regina bit back a snarl. 

“Perhaps,” Regina said quietly, looking down at the dirty ground, “I could change. I could help someone.” David laughed, and the Queen glared at him. “If you and your insolent wife gave me a chance to prove myself, then I could be let out and change.”

“Please,” The King scoffed. “Like we’d ever believe you.” 

“You should! I know things, things that could save the kingdom.”

“What do you mean? What do you know?”

The Queen spit at David’s feet. “Not. Telling.” David growled angrily. 

“Fine!” He shouted. “Next time Snow and I come down to speak with you, then you’ll tell us. If not by choice, then by force.” Regina laughed, and David stormed away. 

//

//

“You look so beautiful, dear. I can’t wait until your ball” 

Emma sighed and looked at her mother. The woman was so sweet, but her daughter just couldn’t stand it. The constant optimism and joyous attitude was infuriating. “Thank you, mother.” She replied tersely. Snow smiled and turned her daughter towards the mirror standing in front of them. 

“I remember when I was your age,” The Queen reminisced, smiling a far away smile. “and I was living on my own outside of the castle and facing my demons. And look at you! You’re sitting in the lap of luxury. Oh, I wish I had your life.”

Emma bit her lip. Perhaps now was the right time to ask, since her mother was talking about the past. 

“Um, mother, I…I’ve been meaning to ask you something.” The girl said quietly. 

“Anything, my dear.”

“It’s just, I’ve heard rumors floating throughout the kingdom. About a woman, from your past. I can’t really remember much but her name,” She lied. She knew much about the former Queen. “I think it was Regina. Regina Mills. Do you know her?” And for the first time in her life, Emma saw a rage form on her mother’s face. 

“Where did you hear that name?” She asked with a quiet anger. “How did you hear that name?” Emma said nothing. “Where, Emma!”

“L-like I said, it was just around the kingdom. People in the village, maids and chefs in the castle. Can you tell me who she is?” 

“No!” She shouted. “Listen to me, Emma, and listen well. You are to never,  _ ever _ , talk about that woman again. And do not, do not, try and learn anything about her. Is that clear?” 

“Y-yes, mother.” Emma said softly. The blonde looked down, guilty, almost, at how she had angered her mother. As her mother left the room, the girl stepped down from the small stage she was on, and sat down in the chair in her bedroom. What could Regina have done that made her mother, normally so sweet and gentle, throw a fit of rage and anger as she just had? 

Well, she thought, I suppose I could just ask Regina tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey everyone! this chapter is definitely shorter than the others so far, but it really is just standing for filler right now. from here on out i'm writing new chapters, so updates are going to take longer than they have been. but the story is really going to get going in these next few updates, and i hope y'all will enjoy :)  
> kudos & reviews are always appreciated!

**Author's Note:**

> i'll be updating this one a lot sooner since i have like 5 chapters already written, granted they're pretty short.  
> reviews are appreciated, thanks for reading!


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